Malaise and coming out of it…


I have been under such a malaise this year.  I thought for a while it was my depression making it’s way back to me, but the signs haven’t been my normal signs.  Just a general blahness and lethargy, and overwhelming tiredness combined with insomnia.

And there have been so many little things, well, not all little, that just left me feeling overwhelmed,  And the more overwhelmed and behind I got, the more I got stuck wading in the stagnant water, glooping about in the mud.

Thank goodness for good friends who came along to encourage me to just start moving and to do something.  Even as I took small steps I felt less stuck.  And I am not yet completely unstuck, but feeling much less bogged down.  Maybe because I am crossing things off my to-do list.  Finally.

Funny how the things we can procrastinate over, because we think they are going to take HOURS and suck all of our energy, end up taking just a fraction of the time, but the weight they release as that black line goes through them is invigorating all by itself.

I stayed away from here, even though I had stuff to show, because I was so stuck in that blahness.  I really was going no where fast, and I didn’t also know what to say about that.  I didn’t feel like covering it up, I didn’t feel like much to be fair, but I needed a bit of a tug to get my arse into gear.  And it is not that I did nothing in the time of quiet introspection and reflection as well as procrastination…

Really there is a lot to say.  My baby started school.  Gosh, how the time has gone.  I don’t know where the last five years went.  And she has settled into school with an almighty amount of ease and grace, charming the pants of everyone.


And we had puppies…


And throughout I still saving grace was my paint.  And had some life changing moments…

Current works in progress…




And I have more besides, but they can be separate posts.  I just want to pop in and smudge out the place and open the windows and reclaim the space!  :)


2 thoughts on “Malaise and coming out of it…

  1. I just found your blog through Daisy Yellow and have enjoyed your posts. But I have to ask, is that a Maori cloak on your daughter? We are from the States, but spent a year in Whakatane, and my girls went to Paroa school in a language immersion program. It was fantastic and kind of unexpected because we sort of fell into it. But the cloak made me think of a graduation ceremony I went to for one of the women I met at Toroa Kohunga Reo (I think i’m spelling everything wrong, it was a few years ago).
    I’m glad you have some friends helping you sort out your down time. It really does feed on itself, and sometimes just getting in motion helps (mental motion, physical motion, creative motion). Good luck.

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