So my beloved has had a sore leg for over a month, and despite my suggestions/nagging/pleading would not go to the doctor because it would be a waste of time for a sore leg. And then on Monday he suggested it may be time to make an appointment. Given by this stage the swelling and hardly been able to walk, I think that point had passed a while ago, but I just nodded quietly and made the appointment.
The doctor didn’t know what was the cause of his leg problems and sent him for a scan.
While he was at the scan, I was on my way to collect our son from school, and I got this text:
“Have blood clots, going to ed [emergency department], will see you at home”
Really? See me at home? BLOOD CLOTS????
Having seen a few medical programmes I imagined blood clots traveling to major organs and so began the complete shift of my current paradigm.
We had a brief text conversation that I would come up to the hospital with the children and he assuring me that all was well and he would see me at home.
I didn’t bother to argue.
We went to the hospital. Frankly he was dreaming to imagine I would ever do otherwise.
When he first saw me he told me we had to discuss some general disobedience issues. I cried.
The doctor said Deep Vein Thrombosis and mm’s from been very dangerous. And I cried.
To be honest I had cried at the initial text as well. And I have cried a lot since. I am a crier anyway.
And we are in the middle of daily injections, and blood thinners. And I am worried sick.
And I wake up countless times a night to make sure he is still breathing. He did suggest in a smart arse kind of way that I didn’t know if he had a clot to the brain while he was still breathing and I offered to wake him to check cognitive function when I checked he was still breathing.
And he calls me in to listen to his new theme song, which turns out to be “Knocking on heavens door”.
One of the reasons I love this man is his sense of humour and how much he makes me laugh. But I am not in a laughing mood yet. He does persist in trying though. Sometimes it has worked, other times I end up in tears.
But I know he gets it, because we had a discussion and he illustrated clearly he got it. So I get it. He is trying to take my mind of it. But Operation Clot Watch is quite dominant in my thoughts.
I am grateful for doctors and my paints.
It is amazing to me how something like this completely puts all other stresses into perspective. You remember what is important.
Just in case you lose focus. Especially at this time of year.
A new calmness has descended on me.
I love Christmas. I go completely over the top with the homemade baking and crafts and activities.
I love it.
But this year some stress had crept in as well.
Now I am refocused once again on what is important. Funny how sometimes that needs a big wake up call, though if I could order a lesson a little less life threatening and scary I would appreciate it.
The art belongs to the FREE altered book class that is still on over here (with new content STILL added every week for at least the next four weeks)….
And if you are looking for a new project for the year can I suggest this that looks freaking cool. Though I have other plans for next year (that I will announce soon), and I won’t be doing it, I do recommend it and can hardly wait to see what people do with their stories and postcards…just a super cool idea, and already some fantastic people have signed up. I was so, so tempted…(and there is still time before it begins where I may change my mind :))
Back to Operation Clot Watch…and of course Christmas, arting and everything else that fills in the cracks.