I have been in a funny heady space the last couple of weeks. I have felt quite heavy with life and decisions and a good dose of aimlessness thrown in.
A friend took their life and it was completely unexpected, and it gives pause to reflect. I had other bad news as well, but really I have been a bit stopped in my tracks by this.
That is my problem I think, I think too much. I went to the place of where was she that she though this was her only option, and then as I thought about where she must have been, I just got a bit lost there. I aspire to live more in the present and be more aware and mindful. The skill is in living that truth when life comes calling.
While all this was going on, I actually thought I hadn’t created much, but I have when looking back been quite busy, probably what has pulled me up and out of the stuckness.
I bought a sewing machine a couple of years ago, took it out once or twice, and it just scared me. Visions of that young girl getting kicked out of sewing class and going into extra woodwork and metal work classes (which I was not unhappy about :)) kept plaguing me and I would become paralysed.
And then a couple of months ago I bought a free form darning foot. I stashed that with the unused sewing machine.
And then came the weekend. A while ago I bought some canvas books for an online art class I was doing. I had a vision for how they would end up, and the online teacher ended up losing her momentum, and so the journals were barely used. And I didn’t use mine for that project at all. It just didn’t call to me.
But I had a vision on the weekend, and decided to get them out. The pages were all doubled over, so I cut the sides to make extra pages, as I want it to be art journal-ly. I originally intended to pinking shear the outside edges to stop fraying, but my old second hand pinking shears are too blunt for that, and so I got the machine out to figure out how to zig zag the edges. Thanks to the manual and google I had figured that out in no time. And then I got hit by the sewing bug.
Look at those stitches!
And then I began playing with paper and I got out the darning foot and figured out how that worked. All the time telling myself I was just playing. I will be honest and two needles were broken during my play period, but I am no longer afraid of the machine. I loved it.
I have so scraps of paper now sewn together. Some will form journal pages, others like the one pictured above…I don’t know what I will do with them. Maybe journal pages. I just went on a sewing rampage. And I am completely in love with what that machine can do. And the free motion darning foot…oh my gosh. I was like a child.
And then I remembered reading something a long time ago just after I got my sewing machine, and I had material stashed for that, and I had even bought the ribbons, so I went ahead and ran them up after doing a quick google search for the post…
And funnily enough these were just before dinner as well. Note there is only one skirt pictured but there were two made, she is wearing one of them today! :)
I have to say it appeals greatly to my hippie sensibilities that my daughter was twirling around in a new skirt made from sheets I slept on as a child. I had rescued them from my sister a while ago who had been given them to use as drop cloths and I am so glad I did. The stitching isn’t perfect and my mother mentioned how the stitches weren’t very straight…but frankly…I love it. I love that it is crooked stitching made with this mama’s love.